We shower together in the morning and sleep naked in the same bed. But nothing more, she has not once made any move on me. Friday 6 th August: Today h...s been a very strange day; a tension has arisen between Lily and me. I wanted her so much that my body is aching. We started sentences but could not finish them; we walked around museums and shops but took nothing in. Friday 6 th August evening: We have undressed and are ready for bed, she moves towards me to kiss me, I refuse her lips, and she. Aval meendum sathishin poolai sappinaal athu ezhunthu nindrathu naan en koothiyai vilakkiyavaru sofavil oru kalai vaithum oru kaalai tharayil vaithum nindren aval avan poolai eduthu en koothiyil porthuinaal naan avan poolin meethu utkarnthu ezhunthen avalo antha nerathil en soothil viralai vittu kuthi kondu irundhal enakku rendum pakkamum sugamaga irundhadhu. Avanai tharayil eezhuthu padukkavaithu avan poolil meethu amarnthu veri vanthathu pol naane vothen, konja nerathil enakkum veri vanthu. Me moving my trailer a few months before had helped keep things quiet. In retrospect it had been a very good idea.After a year on the outside I should have had more real friends. Most of the people I hung out with were ex-cons, or other people in trouble or just down on their luck. Well with the exception of a few cops of one flavor or another.All that shit probably prepared me for the decision I made on my first anniversary outside. I decided that I wanted to see the United States. Not on some. I stopped her and said, "Let me take care of you first." I unzipped her skirt, dropped it to the floor. She stood there in just her black hose and black cotton panties, her pubic hair sticking out from all sides. I carried on sucking on her breasts whilst rubbing the palm of my hand against her pussy. She was desperate by now, forcing herself down against my hand. We sat back on the sofa. Jean reclined back and I went to work on kissing her pantyhose-covered toes working my way up her legs to.