With that I had James stand up, Stacy took the measuring tape and stretched it out, James measured 12-1/2", and I took a video of Stacy kneeling in fr...nt of James holding the tape.I gave Stacy the camera and I measured Jarrod at 11", Stacy took the video. "Ok" said James "It's our turn." He took the tape and measured Stacy's chest, indeed she was a 38. I took the video. I lifted my arms and let Jarrod put the tape around me, a perfect 36. I was surprised to hear Stacy say," I want a video of me. Then Sunny got a suspicious look in her eyes."No. I didn't do that on purpose. I think I can give you a good idea pretty quickly. The guest list has reached eleven hundred seventy-three and that's with my Mom trying to keep it down, not so much because they care about cost, but if it gets much bigger they're going to have to try to get the Convention Center. No place else will be big enough."I used a calculator. If I spend just ten seconds with each guest, that's over three hours and fifteen. We will always be at war in the sandbox. They agreed and gave me a list of numbers for help if I needed it when I got home and their personal contact numbers if I needed to talk to them.At noon we went out to parade grounds with the other 5000 or so soldiers that were being rotated out. My family and Betty's family were seated in the section behind my group.After all the pomp and circumstance and the Commander's address, the Generals started with the routine, patting each other on the back and. You see it is kind of my fantasy because it is almost all real. You see my wife is a goody girl, never smoked never drank, never did drugs and was top of her class in high school and college and her dad gave her his company to run. Well her stepmom was furious and she said she would get even with my wife. So I am not aloud to go over to my in-laws house without my wife because my wife thinks that her stepmom is a witch and she will put a spell on me. That is the truth she tells everyone that.