The air is nice and cool and I am enjoying the night calmness. I get to the main road, turn around and start walking back. I can see lights coming u... the main road but it doesn't concern me as I continue to walk. When the car approaches it slows down and I hear a voice asking me for directions. Another person lost I think as I turn around to help them out. I get to the window to point them in the right direction and I see three men in the car. Nice looking to add. I lean down to the. "Pammy? Hi."Pam started talking a mile a minute, just like she used to. I sat therelistening to my old friend and I got a smile on my face and a warmfeeling in my belly. She asked how I was doing and I told her what wasup. She asked who I had seen from the old group and we talked about thatfor a minute or two. I said something about getting together and shejumped right on it."How bout shopping?" Yea shopping would be good." I answered."How about today?" Today? Well Yea today would be ok."Great. And so it was that they were all that stood between me remaining an individual, and me turning into a pathetic little slave.I got close several times to breaking those new rules. Several times I considered masturbating the second I got home, and several times I put unlit cigarettes to my lips. But none of those cigarettes were ever lit. When I finally did get home I went straight to the kitchen to get dinner ready for my dad and brothers, never touching myself intimately, even when I changed. "You ought to go out and climb up and down the stairs a few times, boss," Jerry offered. "Get yourself used to the shoes and the skirt. Let yourself feel them, be part of you so you're not so stiff on camera."Art was nodding, so I knew they were right, but I really didn't want to leave the safety of the studio and let anyone else see me in this getup. It was embarrassing enough with this small group, let alone the rest of the staff. "Screw what anyone else thinks, Mac!" Carol must have been.