Ranjani noticed my uneasiness and furtively smiled at me which irritated me more. Then we four played cards for sometime. Aunty took some of the vadag...ms which had dried well and fried them. We all ate it. Then later the three of them left to their houses for having their snacks.In the evening aunty wanted to go to temple because there was a religious discourse arranged. She asked me also to come but I was not interested. I waited to see whether Radha and Ranjani will come. But they did not. When that had no effect, I started ramping it up to play with myself, making it seem innocent, as he watched. Sometimes I got myself off when we were alone and watching TV together. It felt so dirty to have my shirt pulled up as I pinched a nipple while my fingers made wet noises as I brought myself off. Sometimes I did it a dozen times a day. I got mom to let me home school myself after I got into a lot of fights. By then I couldn’t stop teasing him. I was hooked on him watching me get myself. As I expected, all three of them rolled over and tried to swing their rifles to point towards me. That was a real stupid thing to do! I fired one barrel at the one in the middle and eliminated him from his life of toil and troubles. There was enough spread at that distance that I winged both of the other two fools, and they started looking real uncomfortable. They dropped their Spencers real quick like, and held up their hands."Are either one of you wounded bad enough that you can't ride? Ifen. Unfortunately those elated feelings only last a little while, and I also recall feeling terrible when I got home. I thought I had done something terrible and felt pretty bad about it for hours. I remember waking up in the middle of the night and taking a shower to wash off the experience. My mom woke up and asked me if I was ok and I really almost told her what I did……but something made me tell her I was fine and just having trouble sleeping. I kinda struggled for days with mixed feelings.