I wanted to tell him but a lot of the time we hung out we were with his friends and telling him would be super awkward in front of them. One day, I to...d him to meet me in the boy's locker during Gym class break, usually around fifteen-twenty minutes. I never saw him in the locker but I did see his two friends Ryan and Kevin in there and I talked to them for a little and asked them where James was but they didn't know.I tried to pass them but they stopped me, asking me if I wanted to stick. "All right, Sunshine, I'm going totreat you exactly the way you clearly want to be treated. If thatembarrasses you, you have no one but yourself to blame." Richard laugheda bit around his food, reminded of what Caroline had told him earlierthat week. He didn't get to pretend that anyone was making him do this.Richard swallowed his bite. "It's okay, Mom. If it's too weird, you'llembarrass yourself," he reminded her."All I am going to do today is go walking and shopping with my children."She. ." Have I offended you in some way?" she said."No, of course not. I..." Do I have bad breath? Body odor?" No. I..." Are you avoiding me because I'm divorced and come with a child that isn't yours?" No, I..." Have you decided I'm a slut because I fuck my brother, my father-in-law, my mother, and my sister-in-law?" No! Goddamn it!" he shouted. He sighed and said softly. "It's not you, Darla. It's me."She walked up to him, stood inches from him, and looked up into his eyes. He wanted to take her. I quite like it though totell you the truth. As I move around pushing my cleaning cart Isecretly watch all those faces happy, anxious, shifty, worried etc."I was fascinated by her description; I wish I could do it for a bit,just to get the feeling of being a lowly cleaner among all thosetravelers."I wouldn't mind working for a bit in a public space like the airport,"I said spontaneously expressing openly one of my secret fantasies. "Burof course is not up to me to decide; Signora is my employer.