I guess another good thing is that my parents are upper middle class and, depending on how you look at this, are away all the time. But when it comes ...o school, I'm totally screwed, not because I don't try; unfortunately I'm not one of those kids who is dumb but cool doing it, I'm dumb just because I am. All of these thoughts are running through my head as I try and fall asleep. I groan as I look at my clock and see that it's already midnight. I went to sleep at 9, trying to get a good night's. Then, what the bloody hell was there to stop me dreaming about the accident and waking up in hospital to find Ottilie had come looking for me. And er, well, also discovering that I had a daughter, that I kind-a knew about from the first dream ... Oh come on, you surely can understand what I'm raving on about here!You see, there was yet another very obvious scenario, that sprang into my mind. One that -- over the years -- had happened to me, maybe a little too often if I'm being completely. After Robert got to level three, he earned himself a day pass. During the pass, Robert relapsed. He relapsed on coke and he blew off curfew. Robert missed his curfew and he dropped a level. It was that simple. It was my attitude that kept me on level two. I refused to be therapeutic. I took my meds, but I didn’t do the work. I talked to my therapist when I wanted to and I rarely spoke in group. I called the art therapist a ‘fucking loony.’ As for Diana, she didn’t say much in group. Mostly, she. He didn’t. When I looked at the clock, I realized that I’d already missed my bus. Shit! And something wasn’t right. It was quiet. I was alone. Alone in the locker-room. That thought made me horny. Now I’ll admit, I thought about whipping it out right then and there and pumping out a load. I probably could have done it in thirty-seconds or less (I was fourteen, remember). I went and sat on a bench nearest to the coach’s office. The longer I sat there and smelled the.