We kept to ourselves as much as we could, but after my first child was born she started trying to be friendlier toward me. One night, after a big cele...ration for the firm I went back down to the office to get my cell phone and found her crying at her desk.It became clear after an embarrassingly drunken conversation that she and her husband had been trying to get pregnant for some time, but she found out that he was impotent and didn't have the heart to tell him. More than anything she wanted a. Taking my arm. I’m in a car, smelly, dirty. The heavy aroma of vomitus permeating the air. They take me away and now I’m here in this place of peace and they feed me, bathe me, talk to me … I say nothing, never, not a word for months on end. Two years later I was released. They told me I was ‘cured.’ What does that mean? Should I be happy? Should I be glad? No, cured or not I still felt nothing but sadness. I guess that’s all there is to life. TO LIVE AGAIN It was another three years before I. In reality, I was feeling very odd from the combination of her voice, my arousal and the pot. She was taunting me. Amanda had the part down perfectly. Her voice was sexy and soothing. By this time, I was not really listening to the words, but being lulled by the tone of her voice. I began to feel her pushing from inside my head. That's the only way I can explain it. I could hear the tone and intonation of her voice outside of me, but she was inside. It was a very disconcerting feeling.Somehow. " Good!" The smile was still there as she worked mobile thighs, moving in just the right ways. A few moments more and she was biting her bottom lip, corners of her mouth still turned up in a smile. Her nostrils flared. The movements got insistent. Stern. Purposeful.I gasped, drawing a needed breath. I would need it to oxygenate because ... she pushed herself fully down and back and another of those little squeals worked its way out. And I exploded. I heard colors and saw sounds and breathed.