I think what we have is marvelous and I don't want to see it end, but I also sometimes get so frustrated that I don't have the same love that you two ...o obliviously feel for each other. You have such a bond and I just sometimes wish I could find the same thing; you know someone just for me."Her words had come tumbling out, like once she started, she couldn't stop. She buried her face into her hands, crying harder now. Greg had heard what was happening and he went around the bed. He sat on. Her big brown eyes lit up the barely lit room, and her smile made me feel all tingly inside. He kissed me on the cheek, walked over to my bag, grabbed my computer, and signed on. My phone rang, and it was my mom.“Hello?” I said.“Joey? It’s mom. Get dressed.”“Why? We going to dinner?”“Later. We’re going to mass.”“Awww, man. I feel sick.”“Bullshit. Meet us at St. Sebastian’s or I’m kicking you ass. No car for a month.”“fine.”I looked at Lisa. “Mass?” She asked.“Yeah.” I looked back.“It’s. Not normal people shy, but my own special brand of bashful. I won't be able to look you in the eye, trembling and giggling nervously, biting my lip or fingers in my silly, fidget-y way of self-soothing.You are very understanding, trying your best to engage me in conversation. I am making every effort as well and we manage to make small talk, discussing details of your trip and how our families are doing.I can feel you watching me as I occasionally look up long enough to catch your gaze then. Look, I'm not exactly a rocket scientist here, but I'm smart enough to know that I've thrown away much of my life in pointless fear of exposure. I really want to act on that side of myself. I doubt that we could have a relationship, since you're not into guys, but just think of this as one friend doing another a favor," Jake explained."Well, close the door, and I'll let you give me head. That should suffice for now, right?" he urged his friend."Sure, why not," his roommate agreed.Jake quickly.