‘Joel, my darling love, first thing you must believe is that I loved — love — you. From the day we met, you were the man I knew I wanted to be w...th.’ ‘Okay, then why? What did I do? I don’t understand.’ ‘You did nothing wrong Joel, absolutely nothing. It was me. I loved you, I still do, our life was wonderful, our sex life was — more than wonderful, but … ‘ ‘But?’ ‘Joel, you know how much I loved … ‘ Renee lowered her voice ‘ … fucking you. I love sex. But I couldn’t help feeling something was. She obviously wasn’t wearing a bra.“I missed you so much dear.” She cooed I hugged her closely. I instinctively grabbed her by her narrow waist and brought her in. My hand slid to rest on her generous waist. I had the undeniable urge to grab her meaty ass. ‘What was I thinking.’ I thought to myself ‘Damn, this is my mom. These last two weeks had really hypersexualized me.’ I let go before I went too far. My Mom bent over to pick up my bag. I couldn’t help notice her generous cleavage as her. As I began to warm up, I asked, “What should we do first?”“Why don’t we spar with each other to see what our levels are?” Jen said.I didn’t think that was a good idea since I did not know what Dove or Tammy knew and could only guess at Jen’s ability based on what my Grandfather had taught me.Dove quickly said, “I will spar with Jen first and then Tammy and can spar with the winner. Eagle this will keep you from being injured by accident after we will know everyone’s level of experience and can. I know full well that it’s wrong to think such things but I can't help feeling that way. In truth, I hate myself for it. We have agreed to be friends and I am trying my hardest not to break this verbal agreement but I cannot help wanting to push the boundaries either. For my own sick, self-satisfaction, I want to tell him how I still feel and to hear him say that he still loves me, too. Yet another selfish thing that shows how horrible I can actually be. But, Dear Diary, I promised you cheerful.