Did you read his sex-studies? Did he see the Schnitzler or did Arthur read Freud?”It was too empty for me. I soon excused myself and returned home. ... began reading Wassermann’s stories about sisters, but it was too depressing. I didn’t need realism. Perhaps there was something lighter.*“Sir?”“Yes, Josef?”“There is a telephone call for you.”“And?”“It is Frau Anderson.”“Ah.”“She says she must speak with you.”“I don’t understand.”“I think she is asking whether she can come here.”“I see. Yes,. Even after all the years I remember it like it was yesterday, though where I might have forgotten some details I have added what inevitably would have happened. It began on my very first night away from home in my university hall of residence study bedroom. With my parents gone and alone at last in the privacy of my room I decided to christen my new room with my first student wank.I stripped naked and put on the tiny light blue lace edged satin panties I’d “borrowed” from my mother’s laundry. So I look him in the eye as I walk past and he smiles. So I walk into the next open room and push the door closed but do not lock it. I am putting a bill into the video slot when he walks in. He tells me not to put the money in. He asks if I am gay or bi? Strange question I think but I answer bi. He smiles again. He tells me to follow him. We walk out to the parking lot around towards the street. We walk across the street to a van parked in a parking lot across from the arcade. He. You have been fucked like a woman, but you are not a woman.You are a failed man; a mincing, chastised, crossdressing sissy.You will feel weak, pathetic, impotent, degraded.You will lie there for a long time, contemplating what has happened. You will know that you are now a sissy faggot. No turning back. Perhaps that was never an option anyhow. But it will be a pivotal moment in your life.Then you know you have arrived at the nadir of sexual existence. Your destiny.Once you resign yourself to.