”Giving each a quick kiss, “I do want to marry you Chandra and I do want to marry you Celia.” I held my breath waiting for their responses.“I ...now, Chandra told me that we would have to wait until she is no longer a Postulant.”“Just how long have you been plotting my demise?”Celia giggled and Chandra laughed openly at me, but neither answered my query.“Time to get out of bed, we need to eat and then start Chandra on her morning exercises.” With that, I smacked each lightly on each of their. As I am moving deeper into my middle years I am coming to the conclusion that I am more gay than straight. Not that I don’t love sex with women. I do. There is still nothing more welcome to me than a warm wet vagina. But male-female relationships are too complicated. Trust me, I have plenty of older women eager to play with me, but the younger ones no longer find me appealing and I just don’t find an older woman sexually attractive. Most women want more than sex, while most men want just sex.. It always seemed so gradual, and I was young. In teenage years I’d turn around and wonder why something happened, swear that things used to be different when I was, like, 12. The internet being hit was probably what started the biggest uproar. We didn’t lose it, but it closed in. We had the national grid, but they tried to shut off the rest of the world. ISP’s could block whatever the fuck they wanted, whatever the government told them to. Our island was trying to close off from the world,. Then, something deep within me began to open up like the blooming of a flower. I could not explain the sensation, but it made me long for his touch. When we had exhausted the kiss, I could not bear to have him pull away from me. I wrapped my arms about his neck and buried my face into his shoulder and neck. He smelled like fresh baked bread and wool and rain all at the same time. I lifted my head from his shoulder and he looked into my eyes. Everything about him was comforting, and I knew that.