" Fallon is on U. S. Route 50, the "Loneliest Road in America." This highway indicates the loneliness of the journey toward transformation, here rep...esented as the civilization of the "East," a religious and mystical compass point; the shemale, the anima suggests, must work out his-her own salvation; no one can become the new creature he-she must become but him-her himself-herself.The journey (transformation) is frightening enough to make the wannabe-shemale cry or even to feel as if he-she. " And before I can answer she had gone in a flurry of skirt, leaving a trace of her perfume and a disturbing memory of that long, golden body. That night when I lay in bed and played the tape in my head again - but the clarity of the image gradually diminished. I never really connected it with going further, either: she was Ellen's sister, and I didn't do that. It had been a pleasurable few moments of my life, and time needed to move on. I guess it would have died altogether, like a faded. “I’d first take you inmy arms and kiss you. Then I'd kiss your neck and nibble your ears,while I unbuttoned your blouse. When you blouse was undone I'd take offyour bra and kiss and your boobs."She came close to me and said "Oh John, I'd like that very much. Youhave given me so much happiness; you've been everything a sister couldwant in a brother. Now, I want more, I want to feel like a beautiful,sexy woman. Please, help me feel that way. I love you very much and Iknow you love me, so what is. As always, the sight of Ash provoked an instinctive response from me. One look at his stormy grey eyes and I wanted to hit something; one look at his artfully messed-up dark hair and I wanted to tear my own out. The same old mischief lingered in his expression, from the slight arching of one dark brow to the hint of a smile playing around his mouth. Even I had to grudgingly admit that he was handsome in a bad boy-ish kind of way, with his tattooed arms and his nose ring. He'd hinted once that.