"I countered, "Yes, but there is an old saying: If you can't afford to lose, then you can't afford to gamble!"Mary conforted me with, "I'm certain tha... if the spit should hit the fan, I doubt that the school system would want to make this public. I would be allowed to resign and find a another position elsewhere; but let's not dwell on the negatives." By the way," she continued, "Where are the kids?" I told them to make themselves scarce for a while," I spoke as I gently held Mary's hands.Now. She liked to joke and tease about Meg, and now about Lissa and Alya also, but it was always just in fun. It was nice to be surrounded by roommates who refused to judge one another.About an hour after dinner, the phone rang. Monique was the closest, so she answered it. "It's for you, Lissa," she said.Lissa got up and headed over to the phone, putting it to her ear. "Hello?" she said."Hi, Lissa. This is your Dad," the voice on the other end said."Hi, Dad," she grinned."Lissa..." he said. "Allison. “Neither do I ... really, Rann -- but what about Mom and Dad? Do we tell them? Do we tell anybody? Oh ... Rann, this would be such a difficult secret to keep from them.” She said now holding me tight and practically sobbing in my arms. “We couldn’t kiss or hold hands in front of them, or in public. I don’t know what to do about this?”“I think I have a solution, Carol.”Then I explained to her my idea of her living with me while going to SFU, and maybe me getting a larger apartment with three. And I ruined it. I sat here and let my big mouth run away with itself and ruined it all. Not to mention ruining any chance I had of doing that college class. I’d stopped myself before I said the worst things, but everyone knew what I’d been about to say, so it was as bad as if I’d said it.I couldn’t face Tara any more. I looked down at the table. I stared at the grain in the wood as if there were answers hidden deep in the waving lines. There were no answers, only whirls in the wood.The sound.