These Are Compliments of John ASome are dated but are still funny...1. My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds. Only 15 to go.2. Ate salad for din...er. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was a pizza. I ate a pizza.3. How to prepare Tofu:a. Throw it in the trashb. Grill some meat4. I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.5. I don’t mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food in 3 hours. I can still remember seeing her for the first time. She took my breath away. To my utter amazement she was standing alone. In hind-sight I think it was her beauty that must've intimidated the men around her and, if I had thought about, it should of done the same to me. But I was to smitten with lust to think of anything but fucking her right there, at that bar, in front of everyone to care. So I walked right up to her and said,"...Hi." Original, I know. But it worked.We talked most of. ..9 inches? Only porn stars have 9" cocks, so I called. We talked a few minutes and she said to meet her the next day and gave me her address; it was an apartment about a block from Polk St.I drove into the city the next day and as I got closer and closer to her apartment the butterflies, in my stomach, multiplied. Nervous as hell, I almost didn't knock on her door, but I did. A beautiful, dark-skinned, Amazon size woman, wearing a white negligee, opened the door and escorted me into her very. But still, mom continued to nurse her. Rafiq sir entered the house with a bunch of Jasmine flowers in his hand. He felt the discomforts and stood silently hiding the flowers. Rafiq sir’s wife started crying. Feeling dreadful guilt mom tried to leave the house crying.She didn’t stop even when Rafiq sir tried to persuade her. In the evening I found mom very upset and distressed. I haven’t asked her anything as she never told me anything before. In the midnight her mobile started vibrating again.