I had lost a lot of muscle mass duringmy recovery, and with classes and the whole atmosphere of collegeconsuming me, I had little incentive to bulk ba...k up. Those days werebehind me. There were others to do that stuff; I was done being a toughguy.Dying and coming back does that to you. ***Flash*** Childhood Twelve years old and alone.Dad never talked much, but he was Dad. An anchor, one of the things ayoung boy counts on. Father Mulligan came to the funeral, offering hiscondolences, despite Dad. ‘Nice to meet you James?’ It was not a wary response, she was too kind to offer even the most minor of insults without having more information. It was quizzical, a request for more, an opening to begin. ‘Ah yes, what exactly does the director of the museum want? Did you inadvertently pocket a pack of gum in the gift shop? No. ‘ I winked at her as she smiled. ‘ I saw you taking an interest in the bronze, one of my favorites. If my observations are correct, this may be your 4th trip back to see. The gardens had been decorated accordingly with large awnings set up and as the evening progressed and the guests grew ever more festive, the sun set slowly casting its warm yellow light across the nearby lake. I was alone that day, my girlfriend was still only a passing acquaintance and I had no one I cared to invite. I danced with several of my cousins, I drank and was merry, but I was restless as always. In those days I was seldom content to be content and I soon took to roaming the garden,. "Despair and hopelessness are why most of you are here. They are the soul crushers, the life killers. Not sin. Sin is a religions term for breaking the law. Despair and hopelessness, either chemically or emotionally induced... that's what drains the joy from our lives. And the best cure for either one that I know of is love. Care about someone else's pain and suffering more than you care about your own. Befriend someone, listen to them, share your life, show your compassion, your understanding,.