“Holly, I've been wanting to make love to you since prom, but I never thought we actually would. And this far surpassed anything I could have ever e...en have begun to imagine. Thank you.” Our lips met in a small kiss that sent a shock to my stomach. Still, I couldn't help but feel a bit lost. Was that all he wanted from me? It went from imagined to real so there was no reason for us to become more than just friends, as we had always been. “...So...” I started, but cut myself off, not sure how to. I sensed a war zone as Hanna's emotions waged their battle. I could see that her dueling desires, one to stay chaste until our wedding night, and the other to give in to her long overdue sexual desires, were causing her great distress.I decided to connect her to her little sister so Alice could see what Hanna was facing as I began my apology. I connected Ileana as well. My wife, I knew, could help her better if she understood what Alice was feeling."I didn't do this to cause you pain, Hanna.. She told me that she was just looking for massage and nothing extra. She told me that she has to convince her boyfriend to get a massage from stranger. She has never done it and more excited to get a massage after one of her friends had highly recommended me to her. We chatted on about how long it takes for complete body massage and other details.After a while, during our chat, Isha told me that chat about the massage itself has aroused her and she was horny. We continued the chat as if I was. I dont really want todays beef stew special anymore. Come over here, Abby. Its my friend Kaitlyn! She motions me toward our table. Thanks so much, I sniff, taking a seat. Some guys were acting weird to me in line. Aw, that sucks, she says, followed by echoes of yeah from the rest of our friends. I smile and dry my eyes. Theyre so nice. They dont even care that Im strange, because they love taking pride in their own strangeness. That makes me feel safe. Im not alone. But a thought stops me. I.