I have always held a overly negative outlook on life, have battle with depression at times, and having just retired from my life as a full time biathl...te, I was at a loss at what to do next. I had no family ties out here, no boyfriends or anything, but I had lived here too long to considering living anywhere else. But at the same time, the constant reminders of my past were not something I was looking forward to either. And to make matters worse, I was feeling the call of nature as well. While. ..You told me you were going out with the girls for dinner and I was staying in again!!You came downstairs from getting ready, looking amazing as always, perfect dress with your black heels, hair and make up to perfection, I feel suspicious but I love the rush of blood that I always feel when I think your doing something you dont want me to know about! We say goodbye and that you wont be late, but I can tell by the smile you cant supress that your excited about something!An hour or so later I. Not everything,” I said emphasizing the EVERY. “Go take a shower and I’ll call her back in a minute.”Pursing her lips, she said, “Don’t you want to wash my back ... and my front?”“I’ve created a monster, haven’t I?”She was walking naked to the bathroom and turned around and said, “Maybe.” She slapped her own butt.I pulled myself together and put some boxers and a shirt on. It seemed silly, but the idea of talking to my mother naked, kind of creeped me out.I picked up the phone and dialed home,. Mywife was waiting with an early dinner and a lot of useless banter abouthow things had went, how Martin was "handling it," etc."You'll have to be a better friend to him now," she said."What do you mean?" I mean you'll need to spend more time over there doing guy things; youknow, keep his mind off of it. Emotional support." We'll see."That night I somehow still found the urge to masturbate. I went intothe bathroom and locked the door, dropping my shorts and underwearimmediately. I was still.