Look she may do that to me but I will keep treating her the way I do you.’ I than look over at Julie and smile. ‘Fine with my decision’ I ask he... and of course she ignores me as if I don’t exist but to her I don’t. ‘Well anyway let me finish what I got to do so that I can call it a night.’ PART III Three months later on a Sunday I finally finished the family room. It seems quick that I got things done that quickly, but I found out that my uncle lives on the other side of town and borrowed money. One of the staff found us and brought us over to cut the cake. ‘You just go ahead and make the first cut yourself, sweetie.’ I said. As he started to slice I picked up another knife and moved around to his other side. I moved around him the way I had in his parents’ kitchen, rubbing fully against him. ‘I guess it’s as tight a squeeze in this ballroom as it was in my parents’ kitchen,’ he said. ‘I’m glad you remembered your culinary technique for this occasion.’ He finished making a bite-sized. I lose myself in them, briefly forgetting where I am.This happens for the next week or so. She trots up as the train arrives, I let her get on in front of me, a courteous gesture, and we sit in familiar seats. I watch her apply her day face and imagine who she might be, where she lives, and with whom. I invent scenarios where we meet, become friendly, and eventually fuck. I sit there every morning, my imagination a fevered mess and a partial erection concealed beneath my folded overcoat. I. There is nowhere to run, no way to fight him off. I feel his cock getting bigger and stronger and he closes my airway again and I know that he is going to rape me.But he lays there for a while, holding my pulsing balls tightly, and taking me to the brink of unconsciousness before allowing me to breathe a little, for a short time. He talks to me as he does this, andas before his voice is hypnotic to me and I can’t help but focus on his pain-pinpointed words:“I dream of cutting you up with a.