That was nice of her as I stop crying when the bottle hits my lipsand I close my eyes feeling so alone. Well at least my big sister wentall the way do...nstairs and got me a drink, that was nice of her.What the hell am I thinking, that is my daughter not my big sister andshe got me a warm bottle of milk to drink. The warm milk does taste goodand I think I will just close my eyes for a little while. The light iskind of so bright. I will drink some more of this warm milk, it makes mefeel so. We still love each other very much and I would never consider leaving him, but somehow it seems the romance of our relationship has dulled a little. It just feels like work overwhelms us and leaves so little time for other things. Like you, I sometimes feel trapped in my life and wish - well, not really wish - but maybe just long for, an escape, even if only temporarily. I love my boyfriend and wouldn't really change our present life but sometimes I miss the wine and candlelight and the other. What I’m saying is you should give your Mother a pass and forgive her. I deserve no forgiveness but I’m a horny teenager. I told you that I wouldn’t be good for you and I tried to convince you of that. You didn’t listen.”She sat there for a couple of minutes and her brain digested what I’d said to her. Finally she replied.“Jim I know you said you were trying to do the right thing and I didn’t listen but let me ask you a question then. If you were totally satisfied, in a sexual way I mean, could. I had been in the house boat a few times with Jeff, so I had an idea what to expect.After I had the car rigged, I took it for a spin. I dropped the items at Goodwill, then went home to watch the people who took them from me. I also went to the grocery store in the rental car, so I got a view of the inside of a chain grocery store.The days were getting much longer and Harold didn't want me to be recognized, so I was told to show up at 9PM. I decided to have dinner alone before I showed up at his.