This one will be special – I know a guy who knows a guy who gave me something which will make my sister a lot more open to this idea. We’ll find o...t. “Sure, I was already making myself some. I’ll bring it up to your room.”“No, no, I’ll come to the lounge. I want to watch tv.”I shrug and she follows me downstairs. I’m excited and nervous and happy and terrified, but I know one thing: my wait is almost over. I make the coffee, add what I need to and mix a little more sugar to cover the taste. My. "We aren't going to have "the talk", are we?" She asked.A big sign that said "She IS paranoid" went off in my head. I didn't want to deal with this, but I had to, and firmly."Allie, I can do no more than what I expressed physically last night to show my feelings for you. If you're going to walk around on egg shells trying to outrun my ending the relationship, I will end it right here. Love is trust. You say you love me, no matter how misguided that feeling might be. But your actions say you. You have never known how I was feeling or what was wrong. You have continued to love me when I gave you nothing in return. You have been patient while I have been stringing you along. After the girls were born we began to drift apart. We were so caught up in their lives and our lives with them that we drifted. It was neither of our faults, but while you tried to fix it and reforge a connection, I simply didn't have the desire or the energy to make that kind of effort and I simply let us fall. He asked if I wanted any of the weapons for my personal use, and I told him if there were any good pistols I would like to have several boxes of them and ammo for my armory here. He said as soon as he had a list of what was aboard, he would make sure I got what I wanted. I also told him I wanted to take some back with me when I left, and asked if he could arrange the paperwork so I could get through customs. He said it would all be ready by the time I left the islands. We hung up after a little.