And for someone unknown reason, I blurted out sure I would love to. Then she leaned in and whispered in my ear. “ I know your secret, I had this loo... of fear on my face” then she took me by the hand lead me into the bathroom. Stephanie was a pretty girl, nice breasts cute ass. As we were in the bathroom, she said that she knew I was a guy and that I was going through a sex change but she didn't care all she wanted to was fuck my brains out and she would give me a spot on the cheer squad. So for. I made my way over to St . Johns and a little out of the way bar called the Hard Luck Cafe. on my fourth shift I met a man named Captain Dave. He was a real character, very Hemmingway in appearance and age and very confident. We talked, I fed him many beers and he asked if I would like a job as his mate, he had to deliver a yacht to aruba in the next 10 days a needed help along the way. I accepted and we headed to the marina that very moment.Captain walks me down the a few docks and leads me. ’ ‘But how would you feel about that,’ I asked him, ‘surely you’d be jealous. After all he’s only 24 isn’t he?’ As I said it I realised that it was a cruel thing to say to him, especially as I knew how much he worried about Lena and younger men. I rushed into his arms, hugged him, and burst into tears. ‘Oh, I’m so sorry, so, so sorry. I didn’t mean it. Oh Lena, I’m sorry.’ He pulled away and took my face in his hands, ‘It’s the truth isn’t it and sometimes the truth hurts,’ he said sadly, ‘but. There’s a scene in that movie where a young boy tastes chocolate for the first time. You could see the reaction to experiencing something so good for the first time. I think that was what it was like to experience physical touch. It was electric.I started finding ways to make that physical connection with people. The easiest and most obvious one was Michael. He’s 3 years older than me and I adored him. He was a junior in high school at this time. Michael was no football player or sports guy. I.