The older girl finally started to calm down a bit. “I’m sorry, that just surprised me so much. It was just kind of cute, you know? My little s*ste... and my little cousin playing doctor! Can I see it, too?”It took me a moment to realize what she was asking me.“Mary! Stop being mean!” Samantha whined.“I’m NOT being mean! I’m being serious! I’ve never seen a dick in real life before. Except dad’s… and that’s just gross. Well, I guess I’ve seen YOURS, Brian, now, but I want to see it again.”I just. We went to my room and started getting together an outfit forthe next morning. Pam said I should keep it very understated. Wedecided on a pair of slacks for sure and I suggested maybe asweater. Pam disagreed."Nope," she said firmly, "white blouse and white bra. The brawill show up real well; we may as well hit 'em right between theeyes. Leave your hair up and I'll help you get a good daytimelook with the makeup. You can borrow a pair of my earrings;yours are a little too much for office. The summer night was cool but not cold. Crickets chirped in the grass, slowly becoming the only sound as I moved deeper into the solitude. Near the centre I paused, listening to the sounds of the night. The sweet smell of jasmine hung on the air and the pale moonlight made everything seem a little bit like a dream. A soft breeze tickled strands of my coppery hair that had fallen from the messy bundle I’d clipped at the back of my head. This place wasn’t scary at all, it was beautiful. I closed. In a sense, I become his. In this case, that man was my stepson. And that came with emotional baggage that seemed to make me even more susceptible to being obsessed and vulnerable. In a very real sense, Bryan now owned a part of me from that moment forward. I knew as I was standing there buying these condoms and birth control pills, I was acknowledging the fact that I would take my stepson inside me again. I was his; I belonged to him now. I could try to resist, and try to deny this powerful.