“Why did you say that Mr. H?” I asked. “Ah,” he stammered a little I think, “No reason.” I told him I was having trouble again loading a f...lm reel. He felt his way over. His hand touched my shoulder. He touch felt so good. His hand then fell to my breast and lingered there for a few seconds. I wanted him to rip off my clothes right then and there. But quickly his hands found my hands and helped me with the reel. “All set?” he asked matter-of-factly. “No problem,” I whispered back, “No problem. I wanted sex - pure and simple. No concerns about guilt, lingering relationships, recriminations or reputation. Just sex, in all its manifestations, and nothing else.In my fantasies, I was the archetypal sex toy. Use me, abuse me, humiliate me, satisfy me, then pass me on to the next customer. Boy or girl, or groups, I wanted to experience it all. Then I met Barry! He was a second-year student, a little older than me, tall, handsome, extroverted, self-confident and seemingly uninhibited. We met. She was bouncing up and down on the biggest black dick I'd ever seen and begging for more. She was out of control as she rode his fat black cock, his hands and mouth were busy on her tits as he told her to ride his fat black dick. I couldn't actually believe what I was seeing. Here was my bride of the past ten years telling this black man how much she loved his fat black cock, which by her reaction was very obvious. As she rode his cock she would stop and grind her pussy, She must have cum five. I'm sure there weremany organizations on campus that would have been great help for me but Icouldn't reach out. A few girls tried to get close but I pushed themaway. I couldn't take a chance to tell them my deepest thoughts for fearof rejection. I also couldn't rely on my mother's dressing room to takethe edge off. My depression darkened and considering all the alcohol Idrank I'm shocked I didn't kill myself. The thought of suicide was aconstant companion but I graduated with decent grades.