The guy's got five kids, for Christ sakes. Can you image what will happen when the courts get ahold of him?" Maybe that's why Mom's not working at tha... office any more. I don't know if she quit or got fired but she's looking for another job." Interesting. Sounds like things are getting a little hairy for her," I chuckled."Dad ... is this the way it's going to be ... I mean ... you hating Mom? I know she did something very wrong but ... Merry and I ... we have to stay in touch with her. We can't. ..signals, whatever. I had a somewhat steady girlfriend, but she went abroad that summer.Being 19 I was, it seemed, always thinking about sex. Loved jacking off to the 'Men's Magazine; I found in the guys locker room. I especially found the Frederick's of Hollywood the most exotic, because the lingerie, sexy heels, nylons and panties advertised was such a turn on for me.One Saturday, around noon, everybody but Charlie and I had gone. That day Charlie asked to clean the guys locker room. It was. I liked it better when the children were around, but them leaving me alone for a bit was giving me a chance to kind of relax and catch my figurative breath, as the saying might have gone.It was Saturday. I could hear the kids involved with something out on the sward—that’s what I was calling the expansive front grassy area in front of the house. It sounded more appropriate than yard when dealing with a castle like the Cord residence.I was out on my porch, the guest house porch, smoking a pipe.. That much confinement. I fought against the walls of the room closing in on me—pressed back against the claustrophobia.“I’m here, Jacob. I won’t let go.”“What am I going to do, Em? What am I going to do when you go to service and I’m alone? I’m scared, Em. Hold me.”I couldn’t recall V1 having ever been frightened like a little boy clinging to another person. I’d never been claustrophobic. Never agoraphobic. Never acrophobic. I wasn’t even afraid of spiders. Not that I was reckless but those.