He did nasty things to me. I needed him to do nasty things to me, but afterwards, I needed you. I'm so messed up, Arthur, but I love you."It was the f...rst time I'd ever said those words to a man. Oh, I'd told men I loved their cocks, I'd told them I loved their smell, or the way they made me feel. But I'd never told a man I loved him.Art reached out his hand and took mine. Looking into my eyes, which were filled with tears, he said simply, "I love you too."He slept beside me that night, holding. Often I kept opening and closing my right palm. I did not know why I did. Ten minutes later someone stood directly behind me. It was a young woman and her breasts pressed against my shoulders and my right hand came between her thighs. I knew at once she did that deliberately. She slowly moved her hips back and forth. I had an instant erection as she leaned on me and placed her hands on my hip. I too rested my shoulders on her soft breasts. Then she took my hand in her both hands and caressed it. She was affectionately known as the 'Milking Maid', and could move smoothly from a hand-job, to a blow-job, to a bare-back against a wall, and as the men heaved into her, she was tallying the charges, as her body rotated around her clients wishes and penises.Like I said, her quickies were under the pier and I sat guard, like a posted lookout, sometimes listening in the dark, to her moans, if the 'John' was a big one.The main downside to my c***dhood was not the amount of fucking and sex I was. It finally clicked! I'd learned something new! I then took a plunge. If I could listen to Morse code and understand it there was no reason that I couldn't send in it as well. I bought a brand new ARRL handbook, station log and license manuals for both the Technician and General class. I got busy studying. I made flash cards out of the entries in the question pools and quizzed myself. By February first I'd gotten my Technician's ticket with a Morse Code endorsement. I kept studying. Yaesu had a.