Aur ek insaan Budhdhu se Budhdha tab banta hai jab woh iss dariya mein doobke khudko mita de. Sab mitne ke baad jo bachta hai wohi paramatma hai.Meri ...aa ke andar ke unn paramatma ko main pura samarpit ho gaya tha. Woh Prem sabhd mein kaha nahi ja sakta. Bas usme gote lagaye ja sakta hai. Maine is baar maa ko bohut jor se, puri shakti lagake hug kiya. Unke andar se ek awaz nikla.Maa: Aaaahh!Aur sath mein unhone gehri saans nikala. Unki saanso ki garmahat jaisi hai meri masoom maa ki masoom. He could not get his brain to slowdown. Finally at about two in the morning, he fell into a fitful sleepand slept until seven. Five hours of sleep. Not too much, but he wasso wound up and pumped with adrenaline that he was abuzz. When he camedownstairs forty five minutes later, showered, shaved and dressed inhis normal male clothing, he found Mary waiting for him, sipping on acup of coffee."Good morning, sweetheart," she said. "Sleep well?" No. Not really." Well. What is your decision?". "She would be risking her own situation, I surmised. I stayed another hour, sobbing into tissues, alone, but away from the home that had become a prison. Ingrid shut me in the office while she re-opened the library. I left when her assistant arrived.1pm on Wednesdays was a good choice. Sons would be at school, and school would be in sessions most weeks, except the summer break and long holidays. Meetings never lasted more than an hour, but in a hour each member had a chance to ease the burden. Stocky build, blond hair, blue eyes, and what I would consider to be average in looks. Though I liked girls, I was shy and did not have a girlfriend. The truth be known, at that point in time, I had too many guy things to do and didn’t feel the need for a girlfriend. It was the summer of 1974. One of the older guys I hung out with had gotten married. and he and his wife ( Jody ) moved into a small house just a couple blocks down the street from where I lived. Jody was 19, shoulder length.