And she hated herself for that. She had scared him once already, let him see the one mark she had made, the first mark she had made in months. A mark ...he made because those feelings she tries to hide so deep came clawing back to the surface. Feelings she thought she had locked away for good. But feelings of being nothing, of being worthless, of feeling like trash are hard to lock away when it turns out they have a spark of truth in them. The mark that was mad, the mark he hates, was made. It is a place to read, to reflect, but most importantly a place to enjoy sex. It is rustic and yet offers a certain level of refinement; a nice sound system, an overstuffed leather couch, a small kitchenette, and an entertainment sized bed.The next day I was somewhere between nervous, excited, and scared. In only a few short hours I had come to know this man better than many of his friends and yet I could not help but wonder, would the next time be like? The hours seemed to pass like days.. "Just like the restaurant, huh? Are you 'hot and juicy' too?"It was an old joke that I've heard on countless occasions, but I smiled nonetheless. He was cute and could have recited the phone book to me, and he would have had me on the edge of my seat, listening.After a couple of minutes of silence he asked, "What time do you get off, Wendy?" The bar closes at 3:00 am. I have to stay just a little later than that, to close up and balance my cash. What did you have in mind?"He looked at his. I know you’re as scared as I am, Bryan, but if you’ll let go and let it in, I promise you that your life will be complete.’ ‘I know you’re right,’ I replied smiling, ‘But it’s all just so overwhelming.’ Sara slowly put her arms around my waist and held me tightly, and then after giving me a kiss that curled my toes, she breathlessly said, ‘How did that feel, Bryan? Did that feel real enough for you? It sure did for me.’ ‘Suddenly it feels a lot hotter out here than it did just a second ago,’ I.