What I'm doing is gambling everything (yes, even my life) for a moment of ecstasy—the ecstasy of losing everything for nothing. Nothing, that is, bu... the thrill of absolute surrender.It’s sexual, to be sure, but not just physically; in fact, one would be hard-pressed to find any signs of physical arousal in my current state. I remember how some twenty minutes before, Master took the stocking I handed him, wrapped one end around each of his fists, and pulled it taut, just as a killer does in the. Mrs Duff said she had to dash so I invited Mary and Tristan into the lounge.Mary and Tristan were friends but I wondered how much of yesterday she had told him, I was sure she didn’t know about Mrs Duffs visit. As Mary sat down on the sofa she said “What’s the plan today Gramps?” I told her I had some cleaning for her to day and Tristan can make a start on the garden, she seemed happy with that and Tristan stood by the window looking out. As Tristan stood by the window both Mary and I noticed. ............Lying there enjoying post coital relaxation, he turned to her. "Youknow, if I can't use my dick, the contest goes both ways." Mmmmm." Sure. You can't suck me or touch me or feel my warmth inside of you." Uh huh. But, I can feel your fingers and your tongue and I can pleasuremyself, too. I don't think I'm making much of a sacrifice. I'm justinterested in how you feel after a month of denial." You'd really write me a check for $15,000?" I'll write it right now and post date it. . Rachel was shocked at her own reaction. She had the impulse to recoil; pull herself into a ball and make it all go away despite how good she was feeling. But she didn't. She didn't want to. Even so she could feel herself blushing at what she did want.She tried to ignore it. The massage was making her lethargic. Her muscles were too tired now. That's what she told herself.For some time she didn't move; couldn't make herself go either way. The tendrils wonderfully, efficiently, maddeningly worked.