I walked to the grave, and crushed my carnation, letting the petals fall on the casket, and I turned to join Pearl at the head of the grave. My sister... followed me, filing by the grave, dropping their petals into that abyss that would soon swallow my father's mortal remains. They and their husbands stopped to give and collect embraces, before leaving to resume their own lives.Dad had few friends, but those that lived were here to wish him farewell. Most of the people attending were relatives,. "Carrie." Dad tried to speak. I was now sitting at the top of the stair way. I could see them in the living room. The very same room where, just a few short hours ago dad and I were so filled with a confused kind of love,, was now filled with a more confusing kind of anger and a sad kind of hate."Well, not me Mr.! Mom interrupted as she put her suit jacket back on. You let that lazy bitch sleep the day away, you fix dinner and you clean this fuckin house!" Where are you going? Dad asked as she. "We could walk on the beach. It's only a 15 minute drive." "I don't have a car. I'm staying across the way. Should we go up and get my bathing suit?" You grin. "I don't think you'll need one. It's private." I gape for a moment, then force my mouth to close. -*- "You like to drive fast." You reward me with a brief grin, downshifting as you take the corner fast, then accelerate, upshift, and casually lay your hand on my thigh through my dress. "Yes."Shortly you reach up to press the button into. Maybe that's why I put up with Dick for so long.What's all this about nice guys? Girls have Nice Guy Radar. And they avoid us like the plague -- except when the Jerk they're dating acts like a jerk and they're looking for a shoulder to cry on. There's no worse torture than a girl sitting on your couch until two in the morning, looking all wrecked and vulnerable and beautiful, crying about how all men are jerks, asking you what she should do, maybe even saying to your face that she wished she.