Dad and I were left in the room by ourselves. He approached and I braced myself for a beating, but he sat on the sofa. "Come sit down with me," he sa...d. I slowly approached the sofa and sat down beside him. He looked at me and exhaled a long sigh. "I have something to tell you," he started to say and took a long breath. "Your mother and I are cousins," he said quietly. This statement struck me like a thunderbolt and I sat there staring at him in silence. I could not even form words to. I’m conventional, I guess.”“Don’t you think that would get boring eventually?”I grinned, “I’ll let you know when I’ve had enough sex to possibly think it’s boring!”“Don’t you think after thirty years of doing it with the same person you might be bored? Or want something different?”“Do you? For me, it’s a lifetime commitment, and being bored or wanting someone else doesn’t change that.”“See, that’s what scares me about marriage. That you get one shot to get it right.”“I also think I understand. "Any time. When are you do? If you don't mind me asking." I said. "I'm do in about 4 months. About half way now." she said. I smiled. "Wait! How much is this going to cost. I hate to ask. But I have a new job. Want to make sure we stick with in our budget." said Mr. Royal. "Good thinking." said Mrs. Royal. I put my hand to my forehead. I knew the job was going to be easy. Might take me a week tops. But I had to see how far I could take it. I had to figure out a way to get into Mrs. Royal tight. ..Then I wake up, crying.I dont know what to do about this.I dont know who I can talk to.I know dreams aren't real, but it comes from somewhere, but where?And its not just the dream. Sometimes, I look at myself in the mirror, andI look .... wrong, somehow. I look and I half-expect to see the girl frommy dream looking back at me.And the fact she doesn't is a grief I cant even begin to describe ....I've got to pull myself together, shake this off somehow.I wish I had someone to talk to about.