All this has led to me being quite severely depressed, especially in myteens. More recently I've suffered from low moods, low confidence.Thoughts of s...icide have always been there, not constant, but they wouldcrop up whenever I was at my lowest. These times are when I most want tobe a girl, believing that becoming one will be the cure-all for my life.This thing has always held me back in my life. I've always felt that if Ibecame a girl all my confidence issues would vanish into thin air. If. Looking around atthe other customers, all leaned over their meals, I thought I may haveslipped in unnoticed, but then I picked up on a couple of sly glancesfrom men sitting with their families. As much as I like the idea ofsitting anonymously for a quiet meal, I responded to the glances withflirty smiles and body movements.My flirty responses were automatic, almost like it was part of myprogramming to react that way. I was seriously beginning to wonder ifI'd been given a hypnotic trigger to act. Patience. It’s still only evening, afterall. Slow, at first, but deep. A gently rocking of my hips, my fingers playing against your skin again. I love feeling you. Just skin touching skin. Love sleeping naked with you, love showering with you, love holding your hand, and feeling your lips touching mine. But I especially love when your eyes roll into the back of your head and you moan my name. Not sure if it’s like permission, or a plea, but it works either way. Now, I am not slow. I am not. There were three galley- slave Overseers to each ship and they did two four hour stints in the twenty four hours. Needless to say, those stints were far less arduous than those of the sweating slaves of whom they were in charge! In favourable winds, a square sail was raised which increased speed. But the rowing never ceased. As Princess Venetia’s Flagship, ‘Argos’, was heading west, the direction from which the prevailing wind came, the sail was rarely going to be used on the journey to.