So used... so violated. The bad part is I can't do shit about it, the ass wipe obviously used a condom every time he had his way with me."Honestly Gwe..., I feel as though I'm trapped in some bittersweet nightmare, should I 'regret' or be 'thankful' that he used condoms. I don't have a shred of evidence, but at least I'm clean and shouldn't have to worry about an STD or worse a pregnancy."The worst of it, I truly have no one to blame but myself. When you first mentioned and invited me to go to. To believe in happy endings is even less possible. I rode home from Brenda's expecting that I'd ultimately fail with her. Not failing wasn't an option that I could believe in. Not believing you can succeed is the road to failure. I had spent a number of years walking down that road. People like me didn't love, didn't deserve to be loved. For me to even kiss Brenda was a form of stealing. By the time Hans pulled up into that circular driveway, I'd already convinced myself to give up this crazy. She could but hope!At the end of the evening, when they were leaving the restaurant, the proprietor slipped Mr. Glastonbury a bag that Kennedy was pretty sure contained a bottle of liquor. She thought that because of the furtive way it was passed, if nothing else.They walked to his car and he opened up Kennedy's door, but instead of letting her in to sit down, he opened the glove compartment and slid the bottle in the brown paper wrapper inside.Then, the car door still open, he turned to her."I. And curious. And more than a little aroused.‘By the way,’ Mac said, ‘I’ve told her your name is Simon. It doesn’t matter what it is really. Just be Simon for tonight.’While I was still digesting that we arrived at the car – a new-looking Jaguar. Mac opened the rear door and ushered me inside. To my surprise, I found Alice sitting there. ‘Hello, Simon’ she said, smiling. Her voice was warm, not at all nervous, as I might have expected.I said, ‘Happy birthday – Alice.’‘I hope it will be,’ she.