When Ifirst walk into a store, the first thing I have to do is tell thesalesgirl my bra size. But it's not just that. Buying clothes is reallyabout ta...king about our bodies. How long our legs are. The foot and archof our feet. The length and thickness of our neck. Our waste. You justhave an extra little part there, but on the other hand, you don't haveany breasts - yet," she said."So it's okay?" Of course it's okay, sweetie," said Mandy. "It's so much more thanokay! Now, let's get to work. What. "That's good," Sandra proclaimed. "See, it's not that hard. It's in thesecond coat where we even out the colors and get that shine. Watch."And she proceeded to show me how to do the second coat. I don't get topaint any of Christina's nails, though. I just watch and I try topretend that none of the women in the shop are watching me.When Sandra finishes with Christina, I start to get up and leave. ButChristina blocks my path. "Sit down in my seat," Christina tells me."Honey, your lesson is. I tossed back a solid slug of scotch as soon as I hit my front door—OK, it was 8:30 in the morning, but what the hell, it was the end of my work day—and grabbed a quick snack of crackers and cheese, and then I hit the rack, hard.And, usually, long; I was ordinarily not up until 4:00 or so. But with the memory of last night I was awake at 12:30 and by 1:00 I gave up on sleeping and got my butt out of bed.I didn't take a newspaper; my weird hours didn't cater to it. So my usual routine was to run. It's been getting harder and harder. I feel like I am losing control. Dave asks me what's going on but I am too ashamed to tell him." Whoa Nancy, when do you have trouble talking with him? Girl, I don't know that much about your past, but if you're having trouble the best person to talk to is Dave. Don't be a fool and not talk to him. I hear it and see it all the time. Stupid fucking boyfriends, or married idiots coming in here not only to look at the beautiful ladies, but to try and get laid.