EVER!!!!I’ve got scratches all over my thighs, a septic bite wound in one testicle and my shreddies are covered in skidmarks. I’m going back to us...ng paper next week!This One Is Compliment of John A.This is an actual account as relayed to paramedics at a chili cook-off in New Mexico...New Mexico Chili Cook-off If you can read this whole story without laughing, then there’s no hope for you. I had tears in my eyes by the end.For those of you who have lived in New Mexico, you know how true this. His eyes rolled to the back of his head while his eyelids fluttered closed as he imagined himself violating his daughter. After a few minutes Harold slowed to a stop, letting his boxers fall to the beige carpet under his feet. He stepped closer to the bed and saw the curve of his daughters breast. Not being able to stop himself, his right hand reached out to play with the slightly darkened circle that he figured to be Lauryns nipple. Harolds pink tongue wetted his lips as he thought about. She was like him-determined to get what she wanted.But he was tougher, he believed.He took a bread knife from a drawer, and its blade glinted in the pale light coming inthrough the window. “How’d you like to have your throat cut?” he asked.“Thad!” Her eyes widened. “You don’t mean that!”“Maybe if I were to cut off just one titty ... “ he suggested. The liquor was beginningto take hold of him strongly, tired as he was, and it showed in his eyes, making himlook wild.“You’re crazy!” Edna said,. Besides, at least he had a genuine smile and kind demeanor, your intuitiion told you that of all the people that could've pulled over, you were ahead of the game with someone friendly. " A car ride would be great, but I'm not so sure I'm gonna find a mechanic tonight, either. I don't suppose you'd drop me off downtown, would ya, and I don't want to seem like an ingrate, but, uhh, what exactly is your name?"His laughter rung out again, as the door lock clicked to open, "Get in, if you want. My.