I didn’t sleep well. I dreamed of Birgit and couldn’t get back to sleep.”“Oh, uh, one of those dreams.”“No. This was dark. I dreamed of he... drowning and not being able to save her.”“Oh no! That’s horrible.”“Yes, it is. I’ve been having really dark thoughts and now a dark dream. Something is really wrong with me.”“What kind of dark thoughts?”“That loving people isn’t worth it; that caring if I’m loved is wrong. That trying to do the right thing doesn’t matter. Every single person I loved has. " What?" you ask."You haven?t been able to stay mad at me the past few days," sheexplains. "Even though you?ve had more than enough reason to just stormout of here. But you get over your anger and just get horny instead. I?msure that?s one of the changes. I?ve never liked fighting, and it?sjusteasier to have sex until you aren?t mad... I think when you get mad atme, you get horny instead."You feel dizzy again, and have to rest your head. You look at Maya andwhisper, "You had no right to change. " A very reasonable thought had occurred to her that, in all likelihood, this was the last she would see of undergarments for the weekend.And, with a mild disappointment, she realized that Steven was "scheming" a weekend, not just for a romantic time together, but for sex. Or more specifically, sex orchestrated to please him.After saying goodbye to the kids and his parents, they had left for the restaurant. Dinner had really been quite enjoyable as they caught up on events during the week. Then. The following two hours were spent berating me; castigating me and bemoaning the fact that I had betrayed every confidence she’d ever had in me. Finally she threw up her hands as if to be rid of me and went off to bed.I climbed into my bed, but didn’t get to sleep until around four in the morning.I dreaded going to the breakfast table the following morning--- but she had pancakes and bacon waiting for me and I slipped into my usual chair, picked up my orange juice and took a sip.“Good morning,.