She’d been curious. She still was. There was a difference, though, between wanting a thing in the abstract and being offered it in the moment.She no...ded. Even Will, who was often oblivious, could see that her confidence was shaken.“You can say no,” he said, misreading the source of her hesitation. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”“I know,” she said. “I want you to. I’ve just never...” She trailed off.“Never? How much never?” Will asked.“I’ve been with a man, Will,” she said. Kaitlyn didn’t dress like her mother. She was in college and wore typical t-shirts, pants, and sweatshirts. At first I hardly ever saw Kaitlyn, and when I did I barely noticed her. She was quiet and I think embarrassed her mother was dating this much younger man. There was a time early on when Kaitlyn came to visit her mom for a few days during a school break. I was over at the house frequently and Katie and I were trying to keep our noise level down. I got up one morning and went to the living. There I was on my hands and knees and feeling honey poured around my body. I then felt a few girls hands begin to rub underneath me on my stomach and breasts rubbing honey down there too as the pouring of the honey had not reached me there. I felt multiple hands rubbing all over my body, on my arms, legs, stomach chest everywhere. Eventually someone even rubbed between my legs and it felt humiliatingly good as their hands and fingers slipped easily all over my sex and I was now sure I was. But at it's simplest, it's about trying to ... it's hard to express ... the glib way is to say, 'walk with Jesus', but that begs the question what that means. I'm sorry ... I'm not helping much, am I?" How did it work for you?" I don't remember saying anything. I was overwhelmed by the reality, the Presence, of God – what we call 'immanence'. I was aware of His love, his forgiveness, his desire to heal me, to deliver me from my addiction. I just ... surrendered." She chuckled, "I'm told I was.