Obviously, once I'd opened my presents (the usual array of clothes,make-up and all things feminine) I began to feel better, though thatfeeling didn't ...ast for long."Are you seeing your grandparents today?" Mum asked, making me bristle."...A bit later," I mumbled."Oh come on," dad sighed. "It won't be THAT bad. This is what, yourfourth birthday as a girl? As a, you know, 'open'- not, bad choice ofwords..." I know what you mean," I said as dad winced at his use of the word'open'. "And yes, it's. Speedo got up, put the popcorn in my lap, and walked down to Marybeth. Kristy moved over next to me and asked me if I thought he was really going to do it. Speedo said something or other and pointed up to us. When the girls looked up I waved hello and felt slightly foolish. They talked a while longer and Speedo gave me a look. I nodded with a thumbs up and he sat down with Marybeth.I was happy for the guy and I was little envious. I was also glad that Kristy was with me because I did not want. I was daring to hope that she didn't want to lose me and he was a game on the side— a daring escapade to add some spice. I'd have to contain my curiosity for a few days; keeping cool and not giving anything away seemed to me to be an important spy skill. I determined to keep working on it.Trying to be rational and working at keeping up hope for four hours with strangers is relentlessly wearing. Driving home in bleary misty weather didn't help either. By the time we'd gotten home, I was. She was gone. I looked over the scene there to convince myself that this had really happened and was not just a dream. Sure enough, as I looked around with my flashlight, there was ample evidence of what we had done. Near my carved pecker was a bloody smear on the bench where I had tried to wipe our fluids off of my t-shirt, and on an old cardboard box were more bloody marks where she had evidently tried to clean herself up with her hands. I felt scared and a little sad, but more than.