Remember: Don’t make old people mad! We don’t like being old in the first place, so it doesn’t take much to piss us off.These are compliments of...Pat WWayyyyy back at the dawn of T.V. A man walked into an agent’s office for an audition, as he had a strong desire to be an actor.He acted, he sang, he danced, he told jokes, and did pratfalls, after which the agent said.“You’ve got a lot of talent. Whats your name?”“Penis Van Lesbian, Sir.”“Excuse me? What did you say?”“Penis Van Lesbian”“You CAN’T. ‘I love you, Mark.’ I whisper. Then fall into a troubled sleep from exhaustion. I wake up the next morning to a cold bed, empty house, and broken heart. He must have left early for work. I get up and shower resolving myself to what I have to do. I grab my suitcases from where they were hidden already fully packed. Then I call a cab as I decided to leave my car and keys with him since I can’t take it with me. I need to forget this whole life anyway. As I wait for the cab I debate with myself. Last year, I had to deal with a female stalker. The Dean helped me get through the psycho chick’s head that I wanted to be left alone and didn’t care much for her decidedly unwanted affection. Wow. Talk about a nice save. I weighed my options. Maybe Susan wasn’t going to file a false accusation of harassment against me. But I couldn’t take that chance. When dealing with both men and women, I tend to assume the very worst about their nature. I’ve met too many psychopaths and sociopaths. I’ve. I never lasted that long with my wife. Did you have anything to do with that?” Jason tried to slow down the excited Dean Malcomb. “Take a breath, Dean. You don't want to have a heart attack just talking about it do you? I'll be in your office as soon as I can get free in the morning. Then we can talk about our mutual pleasures.” “Okay Jason, I'll see you in the morning.” Dean Malcomb agreed. He added, “Thanks again.” At about ten AM the next morning, Jason walked into the Dean's outer.