For losing a possible lover, just to watch other people making love. For being an idiotic, self-indulgent, perverse, voyeuristic weirdo.By the time I ...aught up with Cindy in the kitchen, I utterly hated myself - even though I knew that I would do it again, given the chance. She turned to face me, her arms folded on those breasts - that I now would never see - her expression unreadable. I braced my self for the onslaught and stammered, trying to find the words to begin an explanation. But Cindy. You see, they aint much that’s more appealing to this poor ol, skinny, hard workin, hillbilly white trash, than a big ol buxom black woman. I ain’t quite sure when I took such a fancy to them kind, but somehow, them dark thick babes make my hillbilly dick just puff right up and go to leakin slime.They wasn’t many black folk around where I grew up, but they was a few, and one by the name of Katherine lived right next to us. Her and mom was kinda friendly to each other and sometimes Katherine. ”We went in to this tattoo and piercing place. It had about a dozen men and women wandering around and one guy getting a tattoo on his biceps. A young man about 18 came and asked if he could help.“I want to get my nipples pierced. Can I see what type of rings you have?”As he walked with us to this display case, “We have the best assortment of rings and bars in town, but we recommend you wear a bar until the piercing heals, then exchange it for whatever you want.”“Is that really required to do. They'd step on me like a bug." So what you're saying is you can't do it all by yourself, that you're no Superman," he said, paging idly through my American Lit book. "The Lone Ranger is outgunned and outflanked." Pretty much," I said, shoulders slumping. "I feel like I am letting Ms. McCarthy down."I sighed and went back to my typing when the literature anthology, "Heritage of Liberty" flew through the air and smacked my in the side of the head. "Ow!" I said, a little shocked but not all that.