Want to hear a word I just made up?Plagiarism.Why do cows wear bells?Because their horns don't work.What did the pirate say when he turned 80?Aye Mate....To the handicapped guy who stole my bag--You can hide but you can't run.I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him run faster.If anything, it made him more sluggish.And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life"But John came fifth, and won a toaster.Q: How do you think the unthinkable?A: With an. Indian sitting leaning on the front of the store, Blanket over his shoulders, hat pulled down, looks like he is asleep.Cute young squaw, coming up the street, wow is she built.Cowboy is all eyes and a BIG smile.As she gets about even with the Indian he stands, walks to the edge of the boardwalk, holds up his hand and says “CHANCE!”She giggles and hurries on down the street and out of sight.The Indian goes back and sits back down, pulls his blanket back on and his hat down.Cowboy thinking, walks. She alsosaid that I would have some blood tests to check on my hormone levels.There was a knock on the door and the receptionist entered and toldthe doctor that there were no more appointments that day and that shewas leaving in five minutes, the doctor said it was OK and that shewould lock up. The doctor told me to go into the examination room andundress to my underwear and put on the gown then get onto theexamination table. Whilst I was undressing I heard the doctor leavethe room but return a. “New York” was clicking down a number about every ten seconds and had just turned from 400,000,001 to 400,000,000. The whole office watched as ten seconds later it dropped to 399,999,999.Worldwide, the population had dropped over twelve million since the last baby was born. I ran the mental calculation as I did every time I looked at the clocks. If the rate remained constant, it would take 160 years for world population to reach zero. But no one lived that long. Average life expectancy was.