I feel fresh and clean again…but the hurt always closes back in when I think about my little girl and my husband. ‘Baby steps,’ Doctor Jamison t...lls me. Big problems don’t get solved easily, she says. It takes time and lots of work. There are times Doctor Jamison has to help me deal with a problem in a different way. Like with my father and mother…Doctor Jamison talked them into coming down here from Albany for a week. It took all I had to face my father and tell him how bad he made me feel. She tossed and turned for the whole night, trying to come to terms with her own sexuality. If she had been turned on by seeing another woman degraded sexually, would she like to be degraded sexually? By the morning, she had decided that she would never let anyone treat her like that, lover or not.What was the strangest part was how normal the morning after seemed. Her parents were cheerful and perfectly ordinary, giving no hint to the debauchery that had been occurring just hours ago. Ayla. You know that.’ I kissed him, ‘Yes I know that. I got to thinking though, mightn’t it seem a bit, you know, oh how shall I say this, seedy. A father and daughter sort of thing?’ He laughed, ‘Incestuous you mean?’ ‘I don’t know really. I suppose so, yes.’ ‘Well,’ he said, ‘that sort of feeling is always going to be a consequence of our age difference isn’t it. Be honest, some of my appeal to you must be as a father figure, right?’ I thought about it and, of course, he was right. Deep down I did. I plan for us to be naked a lot. I’ve read enough to have a lot of theoretical knowledge about sex. I want to experience love with you a lot during that time. I figure a week at most. There are two other weddings we must attend and they will be shortly before or after our wedding.”He nodded. We had finished eating and carried our plates and silverware into the kitchen and loaded the dishwasher. I led Jam by the hand into the living room. We sat on the couch and cuddled quietly. The ten o’clock.