By the time I gave up, it was already past my usual bedtime so I saved my drafts and went to bed. For the rest of the week, when I got home I alternat...d between reviewing the pictures, looking at different sites on the web, and starting unsatisfactory story drafts. Friday night, since I didn't have anything else to do, I opened up the email with the videos. The first one was kind of jittery, and looked like a transfer from the middle of a VCR tape. Two guys were working out in the gym, wearing. "I don't know. My voice sounds wrong." "Your voice has changed." "And my body feels wrong." "Your body has changed." "Am I going to like things if I stand up?" "I don't know," she laughs. "I don't know you 'that' well. You do need to stand sometime, though, so you might as well do it now." I do, placing my hands firmly on the tiles and forcing my frame upward, trying my best to ignore odd signals and motions I know my body should not be making. Now, firm and steady against the sink I begin. "She nodded. "I know... That's why I only said reconsider... I wasn'tgoing to give them the satisfaction by running... I learned that from agood friend..." She glanced over at me and gave my hand another smallsqueeze... I felt a lump form in my throat as I saw her eyes starting tomist slightly. All I could think was please Sam don't cry, because Iknow I'd join her if she did at this moment.One of the younger girls, probably around eight or nine, asked her, "Sowhat happened?"She smiled. "My best. ” My friend looked away.“Jesus,” he said, finally, “that is a major bummer. Jim, I don’t know, can’t know, how bad it is for you. But, I can maybe guess some of it. So what did the broad say exactly?”“Not much, she looked interested, even with me in the wheelchair, but then she looked and saw and was no longer interested. Said she was sorry but just remembered that she had to be someplace,” I said.“Man, I don’t know what to say. I mean that’s just something really not good,” he said.“Yeah it.