He was in no shape at all to lend her comfort orto share in her grief. Her grief.. The thought bounced around in hishead for a moment and his eyes wid...ned as realization came to him.She's probably not sad about it happening. She almost certainly blamesherself. She feels GUILTY.Brian raised his head again to look at his girl. He wasn't strong enoughto help himself and to help her, not about this. He couldn't even facewhat he had become, and was putting that realization on the back burner.Facing. The one thing that prison did for me was it dried me out. After my time in the joint all the drugs and liquor was purged from my body. I hurt often and needed to escape, but I found ways to escape which weren't so self-destructive. The prison psychologist would be proud of me. He called it the grand substitution. For me it was a man, a woman or a dildo. Well not always, sometimes it was just looking at pictures of Country Store before I put my hand to it. So I guess you could say I found my. There were rumors about this elite summer program, and I heard those rumors before I accepted their invitation to be here this summer, and to me they were nothing more than rumors with nothing real to back them up. Those rumors were about sex. Gay sex between the players and including all the coaches. One friend told me he heard that the coaches were also secret matchmakers who matched white players with black players. One on one, threesomes, team sex parties and sometimes even black on white. Biting her lower lip Michelle raised the hem of her dress a little higher. “More Michelle! Come on, you’re beautiful!” Maybe it was the sound of those words that did it, words she hadn’theard in a long time. She gulped and, still biting her lip, she slowly raisedthe hem higher. Time stood still and all sound ceased to exist. All soundexcept the raspy breathing coming from Jeff, the shuddering breaths comingfrom Michelle and the clicking of the camera that.