It was nightie so thin and transparent a bride would haveto take a while to decide if she wanted to wear on herwedding night. There was a pair of pant...es that went withthe nightie but since I didn't want anything to get in theway they were still in the package they arrived in. Acouple years ago I had brought something a little lessrisque for my wife. She had taken one look at it and thrownin the garbage and then told me, "I would never be caughtin something like this."I brushed my hair just. That's what those highly paid morons keep tell us. Ladies, if you aren't skinny no man will want you. Hey you, lady, you're fifteen pounds overweight according to our charts. If you don't loose those excess pounds your sex life is in the toilet. Yeah, I love those guys.You're fucking crazy, dude I can already hear from most of you so called men. But then I can't really blame them. You see, in my younger years and long before the thin craze hit, I thought slender was best. I remember the Twiggy. She didn't understand English but she did point out to my right and said walk for ten minutes.I braved the heat and walked along past the shops and then onto a road. She must have given me wrong directions, I thought. I was about to turn back when I noticed a stall by the beach a few hundred feet in front of me.I went inside and it was a swimsuit shop. By now, I was sweated through and a swim was just what I needed. I was out of luck. Their smallest size was a 12. I was obviously not going to. He joined me when I explained my reasons. I almost wished I hadn't mentioned VHS, CD's or DVD's. It took me half an hour to explain them to him.Dad showed up soon afterward and I gave him the tour. He made some nice comments about my taste that I appreciated but the more he saw the more worried he looked. Finally, we sat down at the kitchen table and he said "the place looks great son but it only makes what I'm going to ask you more important. I should have been more direct when I asked you.