She would watch wrestling with her dad and look at hulking biceps and arses as well as the bulges between the legs of the guys in Lycra trying to feel...something. But it was no use. She had even had boyfriends, she had spent time behind the science department up against the wall with a guy darting his tongue in her mouth while sliding his hand up and under her school skirt to caress her buttocks, but she felt numb to the feelings of pleasure the schoolboy was desperately trying to give her.. We left our home at around 8.15 am…..he was very happy….and asked straight ….whats the plan ?…I said…as u say…..he smile and say…after almost 4 months…you better know whats in my mind….and he laugh…i simply reply with smile and give my permission……but as we had very little time left with us……Sandip dont have any work at Anand or Nadiad…this is just he told to buy some time…..but the problem is…where to go ?….we cant go to Sandips place….or in any hotel…..as if anyone show us…thatll creat big. It was clear that Ursus's mental dump was primarily happening while I slept. I divided a thousand years by ten hours per night and came up with a lot. The memories were coming in at a faster rate than they were originally lived, but I could tell the process was going to take a long time.I did the morning bathroom rituals then wandered out to the kitchen. Mom was sitting at the end of the table with a cup of coffee in a death grip. I knew that it was grocery day. "Mom," I said, "pick me up some. It was not like that the other night and there was good reason.How ever short a break people have from each other, they never return the same old 'so-and-so' as they were before, but no changes could be as total as what had happened to me. Not only was I not the same person as when our paths had diverged, but I wasn't the same sex, not the same height, weight or anything.As to the way he treated me, I had seen similar with other women and my mother was a prime example. I could identify with.