I couldn't have announced it and made it any clearer that I was surrendering all those things I'd spent nineteen years telling myself.It was an odd st...uggle to figure out how to act. I didn't want to make all those crazy exaggerated motions of the flamers. As I walked I realized I'd been so busy being something I wasn't I didn't really know what I was. This was shit that was supposed to come out in therapy over years of analysis. Though I knew it to be true, I wanted time to swallow it, to. Rachel was ashamed to have a deep-seated depraved hunger for her lover to mount her further back and send her into a consuming anal orgasm like the one he had already introduced her to. It was such a dirty thought that she knew she would never be able to ask for it for fear of being thought a filthy whore of a female with her abnormal perverted desires.Rachel was bent over now and her head was almost down on top of the dusty grain sacks. She held on to the wooden post to keep from falling down.. She looked at me quizzicallyand frowned and then smiled."My god Mike! If I didn't know better....." she stammered, and I turnedto look in the mirror.I could have been my mother's younger sister; the resemblance wasuncanny.Mom turned to me, a serious look on her face."Let's get you finished and get this over with," she said and reachedout for a bottle of nailpolish.Mom painted two coats of plum red nail polish on my finger and toenails,putting my feet in her lap when she painted my toenails.. Meray hontoonh aor zubaan ko uski chuth cherthi (tease) huwi, mas karti huwi agay peechay karti. Kabhi kabar apni chuth ko meri zuban kay ooper rokh leti, aor mujay apni chuth ko chatnay chumnay, aor chuth laboonh kay darmianh aor chuth kay ander zuban pehrnay deti. Phir wohi chutar ka agay peechay hona aor wohi meri zubaan aor hontoonh say cher chaar. Ruby ka discharge honay wala thah, mein nay bhi mehsoos kiya. Ruby alagh hona chahaati thi magar mein nay uskay chutar ko thaam liya, aor apni.