? For me – I do not know.? It may be all of those.? But the reason that I feel – the reason I know, is that there is only one thing more beautiful...than a perfect woman, if such a thing is possible to comprehend.? This is the beautiful secret.I know her name, but have not used it for so long that now I am not even sure of it.? I was scared for a long time ever to say the name, because it suggested so much to me.? So much of my life was tied up with this name, these letters.? I wanted her, I. She went after the guy with a vengeance that only a scorned girl couldmuster.Malissa watched in horror as Candy led the guy out into the parking lot,then got on her knees and blew him right there in the front seat of hisown car. Then with a smile she said, "That was for Don and Donnie." Thenwalked away not realizing that Candy was still upset, the Blowjob wassupposed to happen in front of Martha.Twenty minutes later she flirted her way past the bouncer at theHitchin' Post Bar. Her new goal in. I juststared at her as I tried to come to grips with what she just said. AndI couldn't. My mind was whirling. I had moved on last spring from thefear that I was taking anything from Jenny. I had come to terms withthe fact that things were not the same in bed as they had been. AndJenny was fine with it too. I enjoyed my life, I had embraced that Iwas the woman I had always felt I was. But this was a final step. If Iwent through with this I would be physically a woman, or as close Icould. I gingerly, afraidthat it might get stuck, placed her favourite silver ring on my finger,and a silver necklace with a silver E upon it around my neck. I had seenEmma applying lipstick before and managed to put some on without lookinglike a clown, and then I placed the wig upon my head and walked out toface my mother.She stopped crying at once and gazed at me. "Emma? Is that you...I saw youburied today...it can't be..."I spoke and of course my voice sounded nothing like hers. "No, it'sEdward,.