” She looked Chad in the eyes and took his hands. “But, it’s fun sharing my sick, perverted, fantasy with you.”“Well, we both like to look a... her, and now we are getting our wish,” Chad said simply. “She seems to really like showing off too.” Then he added, “You didn’t want her to be ashamed of her body, and she certainly is proud of it.”“I know, it’s just…, I don’t know…” Julie paused and added quietly, “When I came home today, she was masturbating again.”“And, thinking of her big, strong. He clears his throat. “Ah. Of course, my apologies. You must have a whole life by now.”“I—” I grab his face and force him to meet my eyes. “It’s not that. It’s just. I only came here because of Cliff. He’s… He’s not well, and he wants me to settle down with someone, and…”Alain’s eyes search mine with a vulnerable look. “Cliff is your lover?”I can’t help it. I choke, snort, and laugh all at once, making a horrible sound. “Gods, no. He’s like a father to me. I’ve been working on his farm since I. ’ Lara squeezed her hand. ‘He’s in top shape and you know they’ve got great doctors.’ ‘I know. Thanks. I guess I’d feel better if I could talk to him myself.’ ‘You will. Just give it a couple more days. Maybe Bax will call again with an update.’ ‘I hope so.’ Ryan sighed. ‘I never expected stuff like this while I was on tour, either.’ Lara gave her a sympathetic smile. ‘No one ever said it would be easy.’ Ryan sipped at her coffee. No, no one said it would be easy, but just this once, she wished. The doctor would sit her on the table, have her strip down so he could check her for self inflicted injuries. Then he would run his hands across her chest, and up her thighs. And the music would start in the back of her skull and ripple through her mind, leaving nothing but darkness behind it.Lolita would always leave the doctor's exam room in a daze. The music would rack at her mind and she would be so overwhelmed by it that she would stumble her way down the halls, searching for her room..