“Good girl, cos I’m hoping you are gonna be a star of the show tonight, you OK with that, Paula?” “Franco, honey, I love doing stuff for a cam...ra, it’s my hobby, of course I‘m OK with it.” “Fabulous, did Linzey tell you it’ll be mostly guys tonight?” he asked.“Yeah, that’s what I’m here for. I’m meeting a Scots guy called David, but I’m after as much cock as I can get,” I told him.“Aha, a bona fide slutty T Girl then? Y’know, it never ceases to amaze me how cock crazy you lot are.” Franco. Saying stuff like that isn’t going to do anyone any good. She’s not dating anyone, she loves you.”“So no more experimenting, as you called it?”“No, Dad. Like I said she hasn’t dated or been out at all with anyone. Why not you? You know she loves you and you aren’t dating anyone”.“Kirsten, I told you it’s over. I know she loves me and I love her but I can’t get over what she did so any attempt on either part won’t work”.“You say you talk to her, what do you talk about?”“House stuff mostly. Like. Then I wake up, crying.I dont know what to do about this.I dont know who I can talk to.I know dreams aren't real, but it comes from somewhere, but where?And its not just the dream. Sometimes, I look at myself in the mirror, andI look .... wrong, somehow. I look and I half-expect to see the girl frommy dream looking back at me.And the fact she doesn't is a grief I cant even begin to describe ....I've got to pull myself together, shake this off somehow.I wish I had someone to talk to about this,. I got onto the elevator and went up to his floor. The doors opened and I was getting more nervous/excited. I walked down the hall until I was standing outside his door. I was so nervous I could barely knock on the door. When I finally built up the courage and knocked there was a brief wait and the the door opened. I stepped inside and he was wearing the white bathrobe that the hotel supplied to its guests. My heart was beating a million miles an hour and he could tell that I was nervous. He was.