I had a five city tour and eight speech and then was returned to my unit.I lived a charmed life over there. I had reached a point where life, includin... my own, didn't mean much. I actually relished the opportunity to kill enemy soldiers. There were atrocities that Charlie committed that made me want to take them all out. I managed to construct a personal code of ethics that allowed my hatred of the Vietnamese to extend only to the enemy. Once, a Vietnamese girl, probably twelve or thirteen. Usne kaha jaldi kar behenchod main rok nahi paungi, maine jhat se apna pajama utara aur side me phek diya.Usne usne paani nikalna shuru kar diya, kya mast nazara tha, uski garma garam moot mujhe geela kar rahi thi. phir vo ruk gayi aur usne kaha,”main bhi kitni mean hun, tune mujhe itni daaru pilayi aur maine sirf tere pe gira rahi hun, muh khol”, itna kehte hi vo mere muh pe baith gayi, main react bhi nahi kar paya, ab uski panty mere muh me thi vo bhi geeli jisme itni badbu nahi thi, usne. The womanhad stopped crying out and was sobbing, trying to understand what her lifewas to be now. A slave bound to a man for his personal use. She had submitted,surrendered to His will, her body, and her soul. This was a public declarationof their vows. The audience was in aw of the spectacle. The Master the slaves.His power and dominance reaching out into the audience, the dominants did notfeel so dominant and the subs and slaves wanted His control, as if the wholeroom leaned towards Him in. He had it all and money was really nothing to him because he had the whole Greenmount Avenue on lock. He told me he was going to take care of me and all this other bullshit I believed. He even told me I was his special girl. I in turn, like a dummy thought I loved him and felt like I wanted him to be my first. I guess my wants and my needs were not rational at the time. “It hurts…dammit Shawn please take it out! Take it out!" I cried. I told him this was my first time and he promised to be.